(Part 5 of my Bangkok Series)
My Mom was right. Size does matter. It especially matters when it is wearing a pink shirt and dancing on a boat to 'Munni Badnaam Hui'. I think there is a certain threshhold where you decide "If you got it, flaunt it", and it is usually somewhere around 120 Kg.
Quick Recap: Got back to my hotel with my uncle, had to get my clothes from Room 2005 to Room 2014 to take a shower, got back to the lobby 45 minutes after the scheduled time of departure or as it is called in India, early.
Get on the boat, have a few drinks, watch the bride and groom get embarassed when a cousin yells out "Kiss the bride", watch my aunt get embarassed when a grandma asks her "what does that mean?", and we get to the sing and dance portion of the cruise.
At the outset let me warn you, we Marwaris are not very graceful. I blame it on physics. How do you move your body with any coordination when you have the momentum of blingy clothes, outlandish jewellery and heavy wallets pulling you in all sorts of directions? I guess one way of compensating is making sure that they weigh a fraction of what you do, and wear pink whilst you are at it.
Why do people always try and drag you onto the dance floor? Of course here I use the word "floor" quite loosely. It was a small gangway between the buffet table and the dining tables. Lets just say that there were a lot of salads that got tossed a second time.
Oh and somehow they had found a Thai singer who was going to sing Hindi songs. Someone had not thought this through. You have a bunch of drunk men (with their wives), in Thailand, on a boat with a hot Thai girl singing provocative hindi songs and a license to pretend to dance. Well, they say in order to create something, you have to break something first...maybe that applies to marriages as well.
Aunt: Why dont you also dance?
Me: Because I dont participate in public orgies.
Aunt: (not understanding what I said) Oh just be young, have fun..look at everyone dancin......MOHAN!!!!!
My Mom was right. Size does matter. It especially matters when it is wearing a pink shirt and dancing on a boat to 'Munni Badnaam Hui'. I think there is a certain threshhold where you decide "If you got it, flaunt it", and it is usually somewhere around 120 Kg.
Quick Recap: Got back to my hotel with my uncle, had to get my clothes from Room 2005 to Room 2014 to take a shower, got back to the lobby 45 minutes after the scheduled time of departure or as it is called in India, early.
Get on the boat, have a few drinks, watch the bride and groom get embarassed when a cousin yells out "Kiss the bride", watch my aunt get embarassed when a grandma asks her "what does that mean?", and we get to the sing and dance portion of the cruise.
At the outset let me warn you, we Marwaris are not very graceful. I blame it on physics. How do you move your body with any coordination when you have the momentum of blingy clothes, outlandish jewellery and heavy wallets pulling you in all sorts of directions? I guess one way of compensating is making sure that they weigh a fraction of what you do, and wear pink whilst you are at it.
Why do people always try and drag you onto the dance floor? Of course here I use the word "floor" quite loosely. It was a small gangway between the buffet table and the dining tables. Lets just say that there were a lot of salads that got tossed a second time.
Oh and somehow they had found a Thai singer who was going to sing Hindi songs. Someone had not thought this through. You have a bunch of drunk men (with their wives), in Thailand, on a boat with a hot Thai girl singing provocative hindi songs and a license to pretend to dance. Well, they say in order to create something, you have to break something first...maybe that applies to marriages as well.
Aunt: Why dont you also dance?
Me: Because I dont participate in public orgies.
Aunt: (not understanding what I said) Oh just be young, have fun..look at everyone dancin......MOHAN!!!!!
hahahhaha....can't wait to read what happens next! I really should go out and attend a Marwari wedding...you guys would give us Punjabis a run for our money where getting the groom and bride embarrassed is concerned (of course, it is a foregone conclusion that none of the two competing sides would be able to run with all that alcohol and neon-colored clothes)
ReplyDeleteha ha ha so funny! i didnt know marwaris had a sense of humour
ReplyDeleteHilarious! Follow this up quickly though. :)
ReplyDeleteMAD! sequel please!
ReplyDeleteThe 'early' part being cracker :D
ReplyDeleteInsomniac ! your sleep was well wasted. This was good but i'm sure the exciting part is yet to come......
ReplyDeleteWaiting!!!!!